dark & twisty

As the storm clouds rolled in this afternoon, my frustration built by outside factors in my life. I am constantly bombarded with obstacles as the life of a teacher is never the same day twice - those I can handle with my eyes closed. 

But when there is a lack of consistency in what society labels the norm, you sometimes feel the pull of negativity. Even the most optimistic person. It's like the constant need to cut off ties to the weights of others negativity.  

There were only three of us in class today. Myself and a couple who came just as a drop in, they are apparently testing the studio out and considering a membership. 

As I folded down into the firm cushion of my mat, I mentally relaxed my muscles from head to toe attempting to clear my mind of the clutter from the storm brewing inside paralleling the darkness that was approaching the metroplex. The darkness is a choice; as my step dad used to say "anger is a choice" leading me to understand that my emotional state is up to me, to my discretion, to my perspective. 

I develop many activities in my classroom for my students to explore all sides of their emotional scale. Because without the searching of themselves, how do you expect one to master their feelings?

On my way into the studio, I decided I was going to take out my frustration on the mat. I knew that the mat would support my stress, my disappointment, and my pain so that I could grow from it in whatever way possible. 

The comfort in knowing my mat would accept me even in my dark days opened my heart to working through the class and my emotional frustrations. We so often preach the acceptance of others, but what are you doing every day to accept yourself?