levels of focus

I can't speak enough on the amazingness that is spending time with the ones you love. This is not limited to those who you are directly on indirectly related to, but is limitless in being based on the relationship and depth of the bond you share with the person.

Summer provides me with this open opportunity to strengthen the bonds I share with those I love. Today, my mama and I shared time and love with my middle nephew Bentlee by taking him to see the new Spiderman movie. Speaking with him, loving on him, and sharing time with just him is valuable because he recognizes that we see him as a tiny human capable of anything and we place importance on his heart and his ideas.

Then I got a text from my soul sister for a dinner invite. Yes! Of course. The time with her is beyond comparison. We have spent I do not know how many nights together talking over food and witnessing each other's ups and downs always being a shoulder and a ear to support.

Once home, I retreated to my study where I do all the things: writing, grading, beauty business, pondering, yoga, and more writing. Receiving some texts from my brother up north, I began my yoga routine and placed his request for a phone call instead of texts on hold. Maybe 15 seconds into the YouTube routine I paused it and FaceTime audio called Mikey. Through my time with yoga, I have come to feel more and more comfortable with occasionally leading myself through a session, and tonight speaking to my brother felt like the perfect time to go ahead and work myself through a routine because hearing his voice and chatting with him comes first. That's the thing with people you love genuinely and passionately - they come before tasks, projects, deadlines. We spoke maybe 5 minutes before he got a call (he's a police officer), but I cherish that time.

When I told him I would just do my own routine while we spoke he was confused saying, "Oh you can do that? I thought you had to be really focused for yoga like that was the whole point..." I laughed and offered the explanation that yoga could be done a multitude of ways, and tonight I was going to do a restorative practice focusing on my breath and the relaxation of specific lower back muscles while simultaneously talking with him.

What he did not realize that my focus on him was the mind level of focus that he thought had to be dominated during a yoga practice by some repetition of a phrase or total silence. That's a common mistake I hear. When people discover I am doing 100 days of yoga they often reply with "I just don't think I could be that still or silent my mind for an hour!" And the deal is that you're missing the whole point if that's what you think it's about and that alone.

I realize that is often a mistake made; when you don't know something through experience you latch on to one understanding of that thing and hold onto it with all your grip strength. Instead of focusing on the surface level of understanding one might possess, we must push ourselves deeper into the unknown to the experience level where we can truly feel the sensation of change.